I Guess Life Is Always Equal To Obstacles.

At Least It Is for My Life.

Perhaps What I Did Was Childish But I Know How Much It Hurts.

Nobody Know

Just Me and Him Knowing.

Friends Are Jz Getting Lesser.

Perhaps There Never Been One.

I know Maybe The Problem Is In Me.

Maybe I'm Just Being too Stubborn.

But Izzit Jz Me...?

Izzit Jz Me Acting Double Faced or You Guys..?

Izzit Me or You Guys Jz Damn Good In Pretending Good.

Crap..!!

You Guys Are Jz Human Being Who Follows The Benefits And Start Acting Good.

This Year's Christmas Is Jz SAD.

Oh God.

2 Mid-term Exam..

1 Quiz Next Week..

Continuously...

T.T

Help Me..

=(

Is it just me or everyone is having same situation as me.
I know I shouldn't complain anything.
Everything just come and goes.
Not blaming for having too much of BAD LUCK going on.
It's just part of my life.
Inside every BAD LUCK there are good things happened.
Might be very minor ones.
But I still appreciate what I have.
Recently was very happy being together with you.
Every moment it meant something to me.
Every BAD LUCK or sad moment, you'll be right by my side.
- out of words already -

Say NO to 3.69

Almost Lost My Dean List (first class)

Say HELLO to 3.80

Gambateh KoaLa

Holidays going to END soon.
All the BUSY LIFE is coming back.
Anyway not being to SAD about it.
During this break have think lots of issues.
As I say.
Concentrate in studies and have FUN at the same time.
*grin widely*
Hehe.
Never waste my time anymore.
Take my scholarship and maintain my RESULT.
Must have more FUN start from now.
Muahaha.

<3

Going back tomorrow morning.
Going to miss my FRIENDS here.
Ker Lee
Joanne
Teddy
Bao
Jenny

I wonder when can I be back the girl who always make her own decision.
I found decision is harder and harder to make as age grows.
Is decision making directly proportional to age..?
Oh god.
Can you give me a little hints what I have to do now.
Should I just stay in Multimedia University complete my degree.
Bt yet get a no 100% confirmed recognizable certificate.
Or don't waste time on it anymore bt start finding another Uni.
Why in the world I like about Biology or whatever science that is so hard to just find another Uni.
>.<
Save me.
Argh..

Recently read many people's blog.
Everyone was writing bout LOVE.
Everyone as in most are girls of course.
I realize nowadays girls have become STRONGER.
Reason??
Hurt by GUYS.
It's true.
I just wanna give them a round of applause.
Because they try to stay strong even get hurt so deeply.
Not to say each and every guys are bad.
I believe one day they'll realize they have missed someone or something.
And realize they didn't APPRECIATE when they supposed to.
Just that day haven't arrived.
I have read one of my buddy's blog too.
And I agree with her post.
^^
Girls shouldn't be so dependent towards anything.
Anything will happen.
Don't say NO.
I have experience it enough.
Guys please be SINCERE and LOYAL.

-Girls, Be Strong-

Done Finals One Week Ago..
Having trip in Singapore now..
Staying in my Aunt house...
Will be uploading pic bout my trip..
Bt mostly to malls thats all..
Anyway having sick this few days..
Sad case..

Don't really know how to describe my feelings..
It's been such a busy semester..
Barely can have a good sleep..
This hurting stuff never be gone from my life..
Hurting people or get hurt by is really not something I'm good in..
Hurt people doesn't mean I feel nothing..
My heart is not made by metal..
It will still beats and feel..
Maybe people think that I don't know bout his feelings..
I do know..
I've been go through that before..
It's not cuz I've been go through so I take revenge on other people..
Sometimes doesn't suit means doesn't suit..
If forcing someone to myself..
Not only I won't feel happy but even you..
Yes..I admit perhaps this is my fault..
Not everything can happen as you like..
There is no happy endings happen smoothly without obstacles..
I know you're upset..
But you should stay strong...
Like what I learn from my friend..
"DON'T CRY BECAUSE ITS OVER BT SMILE BECAUSE IT HAPPENED"

I know how hard it is..
But it jz will make u a stronger person..
Is not that I'm cruel..
Sometimes it's just meant to be like this..
I hope u will have bck ur smile on ur face..
You're really a great guy full of patience for me..
Don't think I don't remember..
I do remember every bits of you..
Of cuz you can think anything bout me which I can't do anything..
bt jz be HAPPY a lil bit..
Give your life lil bit of colour..
Not let it be forever black and white..
Sorry that I can't answer the question u've been asking lately..
But even love or like doesn't mean we have to be together..
Learn from every mistake and experiences..

Now only I know how BITCH am I..
Can have crush to someone even in the middle of relationship..
Scold whatever things that u all want to scold..
Don't worry it's not to make me feel better...
Jz to let everyone know that I hurt someone again..
See what I mean..??
Anyone who take me as gf really is something suffer...
Bad luck will arrive...
Believe me nothing good will happen if u all bump into me...
Of cuz I hope there won't be bad things bump into my friends cuz of me...
Now only I know the ppl who I once called BITCH...
Actually calling myself...
I realize so much tonight..
Want to say sorry to Kenneth..
So unlucky for u to bump on me..
So sorry to the unlucky guy who I have a crush on...

Been bck for few days...
Knw tat my family is ok...
Not tat miserable as I thought..
Bt the day after I came bck...
Parents argue cuz of the things happened...
I wish none of this had happened...
I hate her...
She make my life more miserable than ever...
Without this I wont have argued with Bii...
I might have fun shopping with fren...

Till today besides meet Joanne haven't have chance to meet others...
Jz wanna say how much I miss them...
I jz <3 the way that their life and mine are similar...
They knw wat I need and I knw wat they're thinking...
I Heart Them Alot..!!

Even this is my mid term break I din't rest much though...
Cuz Uni reopen will be exams again..!!
Anyway enjoy ur Uni Life Ppl..!!

^^

I Miss Him Alot..
Thanks For Always Being There For me...
I Miss The Way U Secure Me When I Was Upset...
I Miss The Way U Angry At Me...
I'm Sry I Alwiz Started The Argue...
I Miss The Way U Make Me Laugh...
^^

-I Miss U Bii-

As Wat I Predicted For This Year..
Nothing Better Than Last Year...

NOT EVEN FOR NEXT WEEK..!!!

I HATE THIS..!!!

-I Love You K*****H-
I Miss Him

Life is full of fear..
Life is full of obstacles..
Life is full of tears...
Life full of sadness..

Happiness, free time..
Hardly can be found now..

Feel helpless..
Don't know how much more pressure I can take for this moment...
I barely can even breath...
God bless myself for this 3 years...
So hope to be pampered by babe when I'm sad..
Sorry for alwiz making you angry..
I tried...
I never goanna have time to be ur 24 hours happiness...
miss you
It's never be easy for me to communicate with parents...
Even my own parents..
Sorry for being such a suckz gf..

I Guess 2010 Might As Well Won't Be Smooth For Me..
Everyday As Usual...
Tension..
Mayb That Coming Particular Day Also...
Anyway Din't Hope Much...
Cuz I Knw It Won't Goes Well..
As Previous Years..................

So Why Not This Year Is Also The Same...
Might Jz Hurt A Little...
Cuz Heart Is Almost 70% Numb...!!

I don't really wanna give up..
Bt if keep on like that it will make a full stop in my academics..
If I always have to follow your path...
I'll miss lots of steps and lagging behind my friend..
Always same things...
I don't even really meant to give up...

What is that make us untill today..??
Is your patience which I'm impressed of...
The patience who always accompany me when I'm down and sad...
The patience in you that even I scold you badly..
You wouldn't want to scold back because you know that will make me feel better...
Bt not the "giving up" and "no determination" thing going on...
How long can I stand..??

I don't mind taking care of you like a kid for half a year...
Sometimes to me you're mature...
Sometimes I feel protected...
I know whenever I sad you'll jz remain silent let me scold till I feel better...
I know..!!
I really do know..!!

Everytime I scolded you...
Am I really that cruel..??
To just scold you like hell without feelings...
I do feel pain for every word I scold...
I do feel bad for my temper or raising my voice...
But what can I do when your heart jz willing to give up rather than listening to me...
Do I need to always use break up to threaten...
Even that I don't think you really get what I mean...
You'll jz reply me that you know what to do...
Bt deep down in your heart I know you actually don't...

If can please don't let me say out that word again as easy as it can...
Too use to it...
It may happen any day any second even I'm not willing to do...

Do Guys Just Love To Say Lies..

Or...

They're Just So Used To It....

F***

You Knw Why Some Girls Just Rather Remain Single...??

Cuz They're So Mentally break Down Towards Unlimited Lies..!!

When Girls Knw Wat Is Happening And You Just Still Wanna Tell Lies Then You're So Stupid..!!

And Just Make Someone You Love Hate You More..!!

STUPID..!!

Freaking Bad Mood...

I Hope I Can Stay In Kuantan Longer...

Argh... I hate Stressful Life...

OMFG..!!!!!

Ish..!!

DON'T EVER SIMPLY

Insult..
Talk bad about..
Scold..
:
:
etc.

THE GIRT THAT YOU'VE BEEN SINCERELY IN LOVE WITH HER BEFORE.

Because you don't know how much TEARS that she had shed for you.
Because you din't realize how SAD is she that she had to HURT you.
Because you'll never know how long she has been CRYING for the whole night with PAIN.
Because you don't know how GUILTY how BAD she felt.
Because you don't know that she act foolish in front of you and sacrifice just for you.
Think twice before you get MAD of and apparently SPIT A MOUTHFUL OF BAD WORDS to your beloved.
You don't know how much you HURT her deep down in her HEART.

Neither Good Or Bad..

Secretary of 3rd Malaysian Debate Open

Treasurer of Japanese Language Society

Member of Cheerleading Team

Good news or bad news??

Feeling unstable.
Since she's in Melaka.
She never felt this place is part of her.
This place is still like a stranger to her.
She is getting her emo bck nowadays.
Haiz.

She need someone to rely on.
She wants to lean on someone she trust.
She wants to be pampered by someone.
She wants to be taken care by someone not take care of someone.
She lost her ability to be independent.
She wants to go home.
She wants her daddy and mummy.

She is going to faint in any second.
She was very happy when her dad come to Melaka.
Was hoping to go home with dad.
Hoping.............

It's jz a DREAM.
Cuz she knw she have to stay here for her studies.

Why Only Girls Have to Undergo Menstruation

Learn something yesterday
Learn to ignore
Whatever you don't like dislike or even hate
Jz stay away and stay off from it
Even how you hate it you can't avoid it
Cuz it will keep stay in your vision area
To continue making you getting annoyed
Even you wanted to curse it
Curse it in a good way
Haha
"Good Way"
*evil smile*

Finish crying
The next day is a brand new day
Brand new start
Even rainbow come and go

-Stay Happy-

Recently I'm in Cheerleading..
I feel like going back to my past..
Cuz before this I'm a gymnast..
*cheers*

Bt I fell yesterday for the first time since the last time I fall..
Although its pain..
Bt I dont blame them cuz they're new so as me..
Jz wanna say don't worry bout me..
Don't have to feel guilty..
It's not you all's fault..
Chill yea..
=)

What Is Girlfriend Meant..??

.A GIRL THAT SERIOUSLY DO NOT KNOW HOW TO BE A GIRLFRIEND FOR A GUY.

Being too care.
Means too controlling.

Being not so care.
Means not paying attention towards own boyfriend.

Nag too much
"U're like my mother."

Complaint too much
"Can she shut up."

Always do not admit her own mistake
Not mature enough

Always say sorry even it's not her fault
"Why alwiz blame urself for nothing"

:
:
:
:
:

.DO NOT THINK THAT EVERY SINGLE THING YOU GIVE IN YOUR PARTNER WILL GIVE IN AS MUCH AS YOU.

Mid Term Is Coming..

Everybody sing-a-song...
Du-da-Du-da...

Haiz...
Thought that I can sleep throughout my one week hols...
Seem like mid term is broking my dream...
I totally didn't realize that my chemistry mid term test is after my midterm break...
Thanks to Winnie who post it on facebook...
If not I wouldn't have realize about it...

Goshh...
Guess I'm going to start my hard work start from today...
Seem so tired and lazy...
But In anyway I'm going to start study today....
For my readers information...
I really can be a study freak if I want to...
Hahaha....
To enable me to maintain my first class result...
I really can...*evil smilie*
xD

For now let me watch my HK drama before I start my studies....
Chao...
Tata...
I will update my blog if I really have time...
Miss yea readers...

-KoaLa-

Conflict Still Remain..

All this while I thought that after I went to Malacca study...
They will miss me or care bout me more..
But I think it's my perception was wrong after yesterday...
Mayb I shouldn't come back so often...
Yesterday should be reunion of every family for new year eve...
My family end up quarreling...
Great..!!
What is a sister for???
To discriminate or embarrass you infront of cousin??
To tell friends how short her elder sister is compared to her ownself??
Is this what a sister for??
If that counts I rather dont want a sister like her...
What I say is what I meant...
I support and stand up for her all this while...
Do anyone know the meaning of appreciate...??
I'm sorry mum if u think that I also dont knw the meaning of appreciate...
I really appreciate what my parents did for me since I'm young...
They r the one teach me to be independent...
They gave money for me to study...
They buy things I like...

I appreciate every member in my family...
Bt not u...
Not u...
If u get into any prob pls don't find me...
My advice u all never listen...
I dont think u even take me as ur sis...
Its ok wan alrite,,,
I dont care either...

I Love U Mum n Dad..

-KoaLa-

Results..

Wanna guess my 2nd trimester result..
Hehe...
Weeeeeeeeee.....

3.71

Phew...
Still dean list....
=)

-KoaLa =) -

Weather Hot ; Temper Hot

Feel the pressure rising...

Feel the stupid temper rising in me...

Feel the temperature in my room rising...

Feel frustrated after scold my beloved...

Feel useless in everything...

Feel the distance between ME n U....

Feel the scariness to lose someone again...

Feeling of scared if our LOVE fading...

I LOVE YOU
I MISS YOU
I SUPPORT YOU
-for the rest of my heart-

-KoaLa Scared-

Ishh..Ishh..Ishh....Shhhhhh.....

Argh...
Tired...
Weeeee.........
Start getting CRAZY recently...
In this starting week....
Really busy....
Keep practice DANCE only....
Ain't enough rest for me me me, KoaLa....
KoaLa need some sleep.....
ZzZz....
This coming Saturday is the BIG day of my DANCE....
Thats the Japanese Culture Night...
Actually I'm jz very small part of the whole thing....
There's alot coming in my mind this few days...
Mayb...
Mayb jz started my stupid "thinking too much" thingy again...
Haha...
This few days keep acting DUMB n STUPID infront of my bf....
And yet he can still say me cute....
Haha...
I tell him tats the way I act when I'm at home bck in Kuantan....
Weeeeeeeeeee.........
MISS KUANTAN....
MISS FRIENDz....

No matter what I think...
I'll still LOVE U dear...
So jz keep it up with ur incomplete work....
Plz dont make me keep bug u beside ur ears...

-KoaLa-

Last Trimester For Foundation

Weeeeeeeeeee.............
2moro is the starting week of foundation tri 3....
I think I prefer going class or campus n meet all my friend....

Now busy-ing for cheerleading...
Dance for Japanese Culture Week....
And Malaysian Debate Open....
Busy...Busy...BUSY.....

Btw result for tri 2 is coming out soon...
Nervous n excited...
Hope dear dear n my result can get what we wanted or expected for all the hard work...

-KoaLa-

My Life Now..

Feel better after 6 months after what had happen previously...
Found back my life...
Sometimes think back will feel myself very silly...
Dont feel is worth to be so sad jz because of a guy or a relationship who had end with a full stop...
Someone who dont appreciate you...
Feel glad that Kenneth being so patient towards me...
Towards my ridiculous temper...
Now jz have back my target...
To aim good results in every exam...
Try my very best and give 100% effort in studies...
Have a happy Uni life...
No matter how hard is my course I wont regret on the road I picked...
Its my own choice...
Sometimes Yes I feel tired...
Nevertheless that's normal...
Every ppl will feel tired once a while...
Jz want to lay back and have a good sleep n rest...
I watched a drama recently which bring up my past and my thinking so much..
Bt what had past means its end...
Its jz a part of memory...
An experience you gained..
I feel very happy that my sorrowness had stopped by now...

To my dear,
I'm sorry to alwiz bug you around...
I hope you dont mind to have a girl like me around u...
I really hope for the best of you every second..
Wish u all the best in ur finals...

So. I'll jz stop here...
Cuz i'm exhausted already...
I slept at around 5 am yesterday...
Good Night Everyone

-KoaLa In The Middle Of Hard Work-